"you're like made of awesome and magic and timey wimey-ness stuff"-Beth
"Shannen, she's not a woman of the people. She's a woman of Shannen." -Joss Whedon
If you're new around here, then you should know that I have a group of friends called the Sadistic Hoars and we blog about toast (it's a long story).
Here, have me reading Dalton’s House of Horror, Story 1
Decided to read Dalton’s House of Horror and then decided to just comment in one massive post as I go because this fic looks AWESOME and liveblogging is fun. You’ll want to read the fic first, of course. Or, I guess, you don’t have to. Maybe you’ll just enjoy my comments regardless.
I actually really like horror stuff, but don’t read a lot of it
Fucking Adam
Well, obviously I want to go save my knight
Fuck you
And what’s the point of reading this if my knight is dead?
Why the fuck didn’t you people choose this path?
Okay, but I knew this was going to happen. It was necessary to kill the only person who might actually be able to help you live.
OH HEY, LET’S JUST LET MERRIL WANDER OFF BY HERSELF, GREAT PLAN
Right, going into the house now.
THE TWINS ARE SCARED. ALERT ALERT ALERT DANGER AHEAD
OF COURSE there’s a double staircase
Sorry, but it’s hard for me to imagine any television set as “ancient”
SPIDERS? NO NO NO
Fucking Adam
CONVENIENT FLASHLIGHT. CONVENIENT LAMP AND MATCHES.
It smells like death. Cheery, boys.
Julian, don’t you dare wander off like that.
Oooo scary list
Yeah, I’m enjoying this a lot
JOGAN
MY LITTLE KNIGHT BABY I MISS YOU
Aw. I actually really like the Merril and Adam friendship.
Even though I hate Adam.
Fucking Adam
Flee the scene? HA!
Oh, poor Merril. I mean, I actually feel like I’m going to feel the worst for Merril in this fic (yes, even more than with my knight).
Fucking Adam
Well, Bailey’s dead
TOLD YOU
Oh shit, the list is gone
I am actually grinning right now and saying sarcastic things like “oooo, spooky!”
That’s how seriously I take horror
NOT ESCAPING, ABSOLUTELY NOT
I say library. They’re always good places for a murder. Because the books get knocked on top of people.
YES they picked the library
“We hope.” Don’t be the ominous twins speaking in unison, boys.
JOGAN
My Jogan senses are tingling
Yes, Julian. You know horror. I’m impressed.
lol logan
OMG JULES I love how rational you are about this
“Oh no, they won’t get rid of me because I’m obviously the main character” is what I just heard you say
“They could be alright!”
PHONES, DUH, YOU IDIOTS
lol but i didn’t even think of phones this is a horror fic who thinks of phones
Aw, Jules, you actually thought there would be service?
Well, okay then, Logan, way to look on the bright side
It’s going to be a twin next, right?
YES A BOOKS DEATH
AW HE’S SAVING ETHAN
Shit
Please just kill Ethan now, he’s a liability. He isn’t going to be useful at all from this point on.
I would say hallway now. We need some more exploration.
OR GET OUT WHATEVER YOU WANT I’M NOT UPSET ABOUT THIS AT ALL
Come on, people, where’s your sense of adventure?
Maybe I’m enjoying this too much.
Fucking Adam, being helpful
No, don’t send Adam out first. Let him stay and die.
You had to go and be INJURED. Now what good are you.
Kill him, he’s a liability.
FINALLY SOME REUNION
Aw, Spencer
Don’t actually feel bad. Like I said, only feeling bad for Merril.
I would say poor Reed, but I’m not sorry.
KURT
Obviously we’re going to go save Kurt
But I’m going to sleep first
Okay, it is now the next night. Today, I’ve watched The Exorcist for the first time. Horror is fun.
The Vines
Great
Yes, let’s go save Kurt.
Ethan though
Just hurts to see the name by itself
FUCKING SPIDERS THEY RUIN EVERYTHING
#arachnaphobic
DWIGHT’S JUST UNCONSCIOUS
MY BABY’S JUST UNCONSCIOUS
I COULD NOT BE HAPPIER AT THIS TURN OF EVENTS
And Jogan yes
Reed is gonna die any second now
He’s not going to get killed, he’s just going to trip and die
HOLY SHIT THE VINES ARE ALIVE THIS JUST GOT SERIOUS
AND IT TOOK JUSTIN?
Phew, no, they saved Justin
Not that I care
Derek helped David grab Dwight
Derek David Dwight
The D’s
Triple D’s
DDD
:D
It’s like three blind smiley faces and that’s why I love ‘em all so much
I don’t know what I’m saying
CHARLIE
Bye, Charlie
That’s unfortunate
Though something was telling me he would be next
Bye, Justin
I’m thinking gate
Not that I’m ready to get out but neither of the other two seem particularly interesting
Ooo, The River. Clearly they didn’t pick the gate.
Thunder
Of course
Wow
Thunder is actually making me laugh out loud
Fucking rain
Fucking mother nature
WES IS DEAD
Seriously, guys, you’re laughing?
He fell in the fucking river, he’s clearly gonna die
You lost Ethan
Idiots
Damn, no choice
Oh well, I wanted to go back to the mansion anyway
Kurt’s dead
Fucking Adam
Oooooohhhhhhhhhh
Darlings…
Oh, you’re killing him this early?
Okay
Aw, I’m actually sad here
JESUS CHRIST DEATH AND KISSES?
Oh, we’re going inside, obviously
I mean, clearly, at this point, you should all know you’re dead
You seem to be taking the deaths pretty well anyway
So you might as well embrace it with everything you’ve got
Meaning, go inside and die please
Micah’s dead
Okay, Jules, calm down
You are the main character here, obviously. You’re gonna die last.
That was supposed to be comforting…
CAN DWIGHT JUST WAKE UP OR DIE ALREADY
HE IS CLEARLY A LIABILITY, AS MUCH AS I LOVE HIM
Guys, if we’re ever trapped in a horror story and you get knocked out or severely injured or killed, I’m leaving you and I’m climbing over the goddamn gate no matter how thorny it is
WE’RE ALL IN THIS TOGETHER
Jesus Christ, boys, get inside
NOW KISS
SO FUCKING CLOSE
Fucking Adam, get off him
A ballroom, of course
Okay, but is this house actually the Clue board?
DON’T LEAVE MY BABY UNATTENDED
I told you though, Micah’s dead
Wow, Reed. I’m impressed.
Whoa, Reed is cursing
DAMN IT JULIAN WHAT ARE YOU DOING YOU’RE SUPPOSED TO BE THE EXPERT
Just let him die, jeese, we knew this was coming
Oh, Bailey
Uh oh
Lights out, boys
DWIGHT BABY
MY KNIGHT
WAKE UP
Well, to stay alive, I would stay by the fireplace, but I personally want to go save Julian
Then again, my knight…
Humph. This is the first time I don’t have a decision.
THE NEXT PART IS TITLED THE HUNTER I AM HAPPY WITH THIS
Reed, baby, don’t you dare
if you leave now then you are going to die
Welp, Reed’s dead
Where’s my rock salt?
Dwight/Salt
OTP TO END ALL OTPS
Lights out, boys
Dwight’s dead now, isn’t he?
Damn.
I just heard a creaking downstairs…I thought my mom went to bed so…shit…*gets the salt*
Fucking Adam
MY POOR BABY
No choice, darn.
I’m going to go check downstairs, so if I don’t come back, hopefully someone finds this post and knows that I was murdered.
Ok lol it was my mom
What does she do at this hour?
Next is the Balcony
Okay, who gets thrown off a balcony?
Hmmm?
YEAH HE WAS YOUR ONLY HOPE JULES SO I HOPE YOU’RE HAPPY THAT YOU LEFT AND THUS LEFT EVEN LESS PEOPLE IN THE ROOM TO PROTECT HIM OR SEE WHO WAS IN THE ROOM
Up? UP? YOU’RE GOING TO GO UPSTAIRS?
Jesus Christ, Jules, I had faith in you
But now you’re going upstairs, thus trapping yourselves.
Yes, I agree, don’t go in the basement.
Stay in the ballroom
Idiots
Creepy painting, nice
Cameron James Valedall the fourth
HE LOOKS LIKE ADAM?
FUCKING ADAM
Aw, Merril
I’m telling you, as saddened as I am by all the other deaths, I only feel sorry for Merril
HOLY SHIT
THAT’S GRUESOME
POOR MERRIL
Reed, you stop what you are doing right now
But of course, I know you aren’t dying
Because Shane is next
Am I right or am I right?
Bye bye, Shane
Fuck, this is a life-threatening decision
I think I would go with child’s play room
Even if that isn’t the right choice, it sounds like more fun
The Laughter
I believe this is the child’s play room, yes?
Reed is next, of course
Oh, Spencer
It just kills me that he and Merril were clearly killed IN the house, so they must have been chased inside or something
And Spencer probably had to see Merril get killed
Oh shit, Reed, why’d you have to run?
Creepy child, yay
DAMN IT PEOPLE, YOU COULD HAVE SAVED REED
Naw, you couldn’t have, they’re all gonna die
Yes
Split up
One group outside, one group inside
Because that’s a fantastic idea
Fucking Adam
Oh damn, it’s just David and Blaine left from Windsor
Why the fuck is Miley Cyrus on my iPod?
Oh my god
QUICKSAND?
SERIOUSLY?
I simultaneously love and hate this fic
I hate it in a good way
Does no one know how to survive quicksand? Seriously?
FUCK FUCK FUCK
I DON’T WANT THIS AT ALL
No choice, moving on
Moving on with sadness
All right, feeling bad for Logan, because drowning in quicksand would suck
Like, seriously, suffocating like that is one of my worst fears
Fucking Adam
Oooo, fire
That’s not creepy at all…
Yes, please, come back inside
YES
ADAM’S DEAD
Oh ew, stripping flesh from his body? That is really really disgusting.
Bye bye, Derek
And then goodbye, Julian
You
What the fuck is that supposed to mean?
OH OKAY WAIT
SO WHAT IF
THIS IS MY FAVORITE BOY MEETS WORLD EPISODE
And then there was Shawn…
And then there was Julian…
It was Julian the whole time
Because it’s a fucking nightmare
HELL YEAH I AM BRILLIANT I KNOW ALL WOO WOO
GOD I AM GOOD
THE TWINS
The image of them together again makes me happy
omg lol it’s stuck on wes’s leg like a leech hahahahahahaha
crushing his brother oh my god i am laughing so much
why is this all funny to me?
Okay, but where’s my knight?
Everyone else was here and happy and not dead
Except for my knight
I mean, to be fair, Dwight probably wouldn’t be outside hanging out anyway
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